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Sunday, 30 March 2014

Company or comfort?

So one of my biggest triggers for emotional eating, anxiety and stress is when I am left alone. Obviously no matter how many friends or loved ones we have, how much social time we arrange, or Skype calls we sit through, there will always be times when we are by ourselves. Some people absolutely love this time - but not me. I hope to change that though, because as I've explored my reasons for eating when I am not hungry, this one comes up time and time again as a big trigger. 

Looking at it through the tool of need meeting, I guess the need I have not met is company, of course... but comfort too. Ever since I was little I have been a big worrier. I worry about going out, I worry about staying in, I worry about work, about meeting new people, about change... you get the idea. So, I guess from the beginning, other people to me are always a source comfort and reassurance. My family, my friends, my boyfriend... are all sources of comfort and calm. When those people are no longer there (although I know logically it's only temporary), I begin to feel rising anxiety at the perceived loss of the comfort they bring. 

So what else brings me comfort? Food I know, but what else? I'm never going to stop having periods of time when I am on my own, so in those moments of solitude, what else could I do to meet that need for comfort? 
I love blogging and writing. That is a big comfort, so here I am tapping away. I love Spanish guitar music, so I've put a load of that on my Spotify. I plan to watch Game of Thrones from the very beginning as I love historical type dramas, curled up in bed with a big mug of tea.

I seem to judge myself for finding it hard being alone, instead of accepting it and finding ways to make it easier for me. By no means will having a bath, watching films or writing on the internet make me less alone physically, but it will definitely help feed that need for comfort in a better and healthier way than foraging in the fridge would.

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